Nine Years

Nine years ago Shawn and I were married and sealed for Time and all Eternity in the Mesa, Arizona Temple. So, I thought I would do the obvious and list 9 things... Nine things I fell in love with about my companion; Nine challenges during our life together; Nine reasons we are still in love...

"Why?" you may ask~

~1 He made me smile each time I saw him. Even when I looked out my window in the mornings and saw him getting in his car (we lived in the same apartment complex before we were married) all dressed up in his Army BDUs.... so handsome!

~2 His piercing eyes. They are most often Hazel-blue, but when he smiles they shine like a million stars all clustered inside.

~3 Ability to get along with my family right away! We were throwing my dad a "Oldies" party. While there, Shawn held me little baby nephew (he was so afraid to hold a baby), talked with my dad and mom & just loved being in the same room with all of us... Probably because we made him laugh, too!

~4 Willingness to serve. Before we were officially "dating", and I was shopping for before-mentioned birthday party, Shawn was shopping with me. We were picking up balloons, banners, gifts, etc. My lovely little Corsica stalled right on top of a hill on Gurley Street. We couldn't get it started, so Shawn got out and pushed it off to the side of the road. He does much more for other people, but this was the first time I remember. Which is probably why we began "dating" in the first place!

~5 His patience.... Shawn was my first kiss, but he had to wait for his kiss. I was so afraid to kiss anyone. I held on to my lessons from Young Women, teaching us how precious it is. Of course it paid off!! (Speaking of patience, Shawn purposely waited 12 days after I turned 18 to ask me to marry him. I found out later that was also because he was waiting for his scholarship money to pay for the ring.)

~6 Speaking of money, I knew right away he had his head on straight. I mean, he was driving a paint chipped car, wearing Army T-shirts whenever he was dressed casually & we took long walks for almost every one of our dates.

~7 He knows what he wants, and he strives to get it. When he was trying to hold my hand, he was too shy to just ask, so he derived a story "from his mission" to get me to hold his hand. I held it for the duration of the story he was telling, then withdrew my hand cause the "story" was done. That was thee night. Thee night we stayed up all night talking. We were up for the sunrise. He had to go straight to morning exercises. But, he achieved his goal... we were holding hands by 3am. And he proceeded to hold hands until we realized the sun was up and he had to go.

~8 His support & strength. So, like many relationships, ours had a bump or two when we were dating. We had hit ours and instead of running, he consulted me about it and asked if we could take care of it together.

~9 His Spirit. I knew I wanted to marry someone who had the same beliefs I had, but I didn't think about it being a convert. That's not a bad thing, just something that never occurred to me. He was so new to the church, yet he had more faith and belief than I. Even now I rely on him for spiritual guidance. He was baptized at 18, went on his mission at 19 and was married just before his 22nd birthday. Why? Because his Mission President told him to go and find a wife!



Bumps in the Road:

~1 School!! Shawn was of course a student when we got married. Although that wasn't a bump right away. It became one when we had our first child. Z was born right before finals. And that first year with a baby and school was a tough one. Which is why Shawn worked extra hard to finish school a year early, including taking a full schedule both Summer sessions.

~2 Baby... Z was a wonderful baby, but he certainly made things interesting. Since Shawn wasn't around for most of the milestones I always had to fill him in. And most of our dates consisted of going to Walmart and walking around, dreaming of things to have, picking up baby formula, and a quick stop at Taco Bell.

~3 More kids! I have kept a family journal from time to time. I record the happenings in the whole family. One thing, as I looked back, that was consistent is during the first 6 months after a child is welcomed into our family, Shawn and I had some rocky conversations. Making this adjustment was hard on us each time, as I am sure it is for most, but we managed to overcome it.

~4 Video Games!!!! I am a pretty supportive wife. Honestly, when it comes to Star Wars and Video Games, I think Shawn should be allowed to have his interests just as much as any other person. But enough is enough!!! At one point he would come home from work to play 3 hours of video games (with a 20 minute break for dinner). This was so unnerving.

~5 Not enough time for me. This has been a frequent complaint on my part. Even though it isn't true. What other husband brings home as many chick-flicks and family movies as he does his own movies and video games, only because he knows the rest of the family will enjoy them?? Each night he comes home and greets me with a kiss. And if he should happen to arrive home in the rare instance I am napping, he closes the door and lets me sleep while takes care of kids, dinner and cleaning. He has also supported each of my ventures in escaping my captivity of motherhood (which usually happened each time I had a baby, lasted for a year or two and then ended).

~6 Laundry. Uck!!! I hate it. First I complain that he never manages to get the laundry into the hamper. And then the coin is turned and I am hearing how I need to get the clean laundry off the couch and put it away before it is time to wash again!! This happens about one week out of each month. I HATE LAUNDRY!!!

~7 Clean house... I have gotten better at this. Before though (and occasionally on my off days) he would come home to kids screaming, dinner not even thought of and the house is a mess!! And of course I would start in on how tiring my day has been with the kids and how he should help more often. This doesn't happen that much any more since I have realized how exhausting his days are and since I also realized that I can get more done in a day when I actually spend a bit of time with my kids instead of constantly trying to get stuff done and ignoring them.

~8 Punctuality. Shawn hates "Mormon Standard Time". I use to be horrible at timeliness. I slip still occasionally, but with his encouragement I have been able to manage to get to most places with a few minutes to spare.

~9 Hair. Yes, believe it or not this has caused some drama in our marriage. When his gets longer than an inch and he won't comb it. That is just a small thing. The first time I cut my hair off in Houston, he wouldn't look at me the whole night. I did it myself while he was at work. I did it again 2 years later. I believe I have since learned my lesson. Not just that my hubby prefers long hair, but also that I can't stand it after a month or so. As long as I keep it below my shoulders I am fine!

How do I love thee? Let me counts the ways...

~1 You are an awesome father!! It is insane at work right now, with the sensors on the fuel tanks failing. But Shawn is still managing to build two book shelves for the girls for Christmas. He even took the time to ask Zach to help him with it. When he buys or rents new movies, he always has the kids in mind. Especially with games! Every time I hear, "We can play this as a family!!"

~2 He appreciates me. Shawn is kind of butch. He keeps things to himself that are meaningful sometimes. Once in the car, after a date, he told me, "You won't hear me say this much, and certainly not enough, but what you do at home is beyond placing a value on it." Some women prefer to work from the home to earn money just so they can "have a place in the business world". It has taken me a while, but I have realized, NOT SETTLED, but realized that what I do is important. And he truly appreciates it. Especially when he comes home to a set table, quiet kids and no laundry on the couch.

~3 Still surprises me! I get down sometimes because Shawn hasn't bought me flowers since Z was born. He doesn't like to buy something that will die so soon. Honestly, I could care less. I just like the idea of him giving me a flower to put in some water that reminds me during the day while he is away of how much he loves me. And it is the thought, right?! Anyways, he came home early from work today, despite the craziness, and arranged for a friend to watch S while he took me to lunch. It was so sweet! I was just expecting to have the day pass as any other since things have been so busy. Thanks, Sweetie!

~4 He cares. Don't let his rough exterior fool you. He cares. On Saturdays I can half expect that he will be gone for a few hours to his mom's house helping her make little repairs here and there, while his repairs and projects here at home wait. Another time, we were awaiting a hurricane in Houston. Our family was evacuating and Shawn went to our friends' house (her husband was out of town on business) and boarded up their windows, then over to his mom's to do the same, and this was after he woke up before the sun to board up our own windows. We caravanned to our evacuation point and never stopped worrying about his mom or our friends.

~5 He listens. Okay, maybe not all the time, in fact he is listening when I least expect him to be. Last year for Christmas he bought me a violin to replace the violin I had played as a child. He even bought one the same color (mine was a German Fiddle that was stained red).

~6 He worries. I have thrown Shawn through a couple loops with my health. Each time he has taken the time and energy and concern to care for my needs and make sure I am okay. When Ranoah had her incident last week he flew back from Florida as soon as he could. And recently in our area there was a incident with a child at a bus stop. He took the time this morning to write a letter to the Superintendent about his concerns. These are things that I admire in him. He truly cares for his family and friends.

~7 He's fun!! Okay, so we don't go hiking or biking anymore. But he still tries to do stuff that is fun that he has time for. We went to the Putt-putt for a date one night. We were the only ones there, while everyone else was at the Skate boarding part of the park, and we played 27 holes on our own. After that we went to the store to look at bats and tennis rackets so we can go to the batting cages and tennis courts some time on another date. I love how his mind works.

~8 Fresh Veggies anyone?? My hubby loves to garden. He is still learning along the way, but for the past two years we have had mounds of tomatoes and cucumbers. In Houston he even managed to get some yummy lettuce for quite a while!

~9 He loves his family. Not just his own kids and me. Shawn places a lot of value on his heritage. He spends a lot of time on Family History. I know he spends time trying to think of how he can become closer with with his siblings and parents and other family members. Family is very important to him. And I am grateful we are part of an eternal family.

Thanks for a wonderful 9 years, Hun!!